Facebook memories did me a solid this week.
A picture had popped up from a little over ten years ago. The crazy thing? I barely even recognized myself. That picture on of me on the left, was when I was SEVENTEEN!
I remember that night vividly that this particular picture was taken. For those of you who have not known me throughout this time span and are just tuning in, this story isn't going to be about a transformation from weight loss or my journey through fitness.
Wanna know the truth? I've been an athlete my whole life. The fitness side of things have always been in place and the journey of my nutrition is not what this is pertaining to either.
So let's dive in, shall we?
Growing up, I was raised in an atmosphere of alcohol, anger, stress, and negativity. Now let me be clear here, I am not at all bashing my upbringing and I believe that my family did the best they could with what they could. The reality though, is that this is what had started shaping me into the person I was and how I saw the world.
So, to continue, I thrived on chaos and negativity. I coped with stress and toxic situations by drinking, sleeping, or throwing myself into whatever it was that I was doing to seek validation, approval, numbness-shit, anything that would allow me the opportunity to avoid what was really going on. As much as I hated how I felt, I didn't know how to actually feel love...healthy love. My mindset was terrible.
Throughout much trauma and unfortunate situations that life threw my way, I found comfort in people that didn't respect me...Because well, I didn't even respect myself. I found comfort in alcohol. I found comfort in nights of partying that lead to some bad decisions.
It was a vicious cycle, really.
I hated myself. I hated how I looked. I hated who I was.
Naturally, this put me around people that would take advantage of the love I DID have to give because I was really, REALLY good at fixing others...well-trying to fix them. In turn, it was A LOT of energy being poured into people who were equally broken which continued to break me.
I was in relationships that would lead me to bend until I broke. Then, I would somehow find new ways to bend some more. I never loved myself, so the love I would seek from others was distorted and ineffective.
My solution always managed to be drenched in negativity. Even in high school, I coped with alcohol as a mask far more heavily than I actually even feel comfortable admitting to right now.
So looking at this transformation to the current picture on the right....
Who is dat girl?!
That, is a woman who found herself.
It wasn't easy and it took me hitting many many lows as well as finally gaining the courage to ask for help.
I saw some therapists for a bit...didn't really work. I wanted them to "fix me."I was seen as someone that had a problem and was "depressed."
This piqued my curiosity to other avenues.
I sought mentors and coaches.
I made an investment...on myself.
I needed guidance. I needed reassurance. I needed motivation and positivity. Above all, I needed someone to believe in me and show me a new perspective while recognizing who I was and loving that on my own terms.
So, when I look at this transformation photo, I see a completely different person.
I see wholeness. I see confidence. I see love. I see genuine happiness. I see peace.
For those seeing it still as a weight transformation, are ya ready? I actually am the same weight in that picture on the left as I am on the right. Yes, I have learned to make healthier food choices, but that also was a contributing factor that was a side effect to the self love and respect that I had gained.
I have developed in every avenue. I have balanced myself to love myself on all levels...from healthy food and living, but above all, a healthy mind.
Many believe they will be happy based on their physical appearance, but I can promise you that if you don't get your mind right first, you still won't be happy.
This journey is what I believe God has instilled in me to be able to pour into others.
This is why I have decided to study more deeply and gain the credentials to be able to become a mindset transformation coach. I love being able to see potential in those around me and be able to coach them through their own adversity and journey to their greatest transformation. When you change the world inside of you, the world around you will change as well!
Thank you for taking the time to read a little bit more into the "behind the scenes" version of Coach Jayme. As always, if this post even adds value to just one person, my mission has been accomplished for yet another day.
....and if you are looking to unlock this version of you, please reach out or click the link below to set up a time to a complimentary clarity call with me. Take the leap to invest in you. Imagine the possibilities of what can unfold for you because you made that call. It's grow time, BeautyBeast. Your time is now.
With Love and Gratitude,