A Lesson in Leaving...
Updated: Sep 2, 2021
I was once given some wise words of advice that has forever been embedded into my brain...
"If it costs you more energy than it gives you, then it is time to walk away."
Just sit with that for a moment...
Maybe one would say that this is a "Millennial Mentality" but I beg to differ. I DO believe that someone should not give up just simply because things got hard but that is a conversation for another day...
"Unless the universal law of exchange is met, all relationships will fail."
So now that we've kicked this off with two life-pondering phrases and while I hope these are phrases you will repeat over and over again...chewing nice and slowly on what it means for you and your life, I'm going to dive into some moments that have led me to believe why this is such valuable advice to pass on to you reading this right now.
Growing up, I was surrounded by toxic relationships which made me think that this was a normal way for people to treat one another. No matter how crazy shit got, you bit your tongue and you just kept it movin'.
*You made a commitment? You must keep it.
*You started something? You must finish it.
*Quitting was unacceptable and not even something you should ever even speak of, let alone think.
*You show up as 100% and "just get it done."
*If someone treated you poorly, they didn't mean it and you probably did something wrong so stop overreacting.
*Something didn't seem fair? Well life isn't fair so suck it up and keep going.
Now I am not going to discredit any of this because this type of "tough love" mentality has made me who I am today... and I fully believe that everything happens FOR us, not TO us.
....But we shouldn't have to live our lives in misery by being overly consumed by this "tough love."
How do you know when it's time to throw in the towel? When it is it "allowed" to say, "enough is enough?"
I believe there is a large grey area here, so first and foremost I think it is absolutely necessary to spend some time learning more about yourself.
What DO you want in life?
WHY are you putting in the energy?
Is it WORTH the energy to keep pouring into?
WHO are you becoming by staying in this environment, relationship, job or situation?
Is there something this is teaching you?
Are you allowing yourself to be open minded and accept that although it may not be fun, fair, or may be extremely tiring/hard, you are able to learn something from this?
Stop for a moment and really think about these questions pertaining to whatever scenario is coming to your mind as you read this.
....Now let's go further....
Think about the money in your bank account.
You cannot spend money that isn't there.
Some things require a large investment that will spend down that account, but the payout could end up being way larger in the long run because you made that investment.
Maybe it won't.
...But first and foremost, you HAVE to have money in that account before you can spend it.
So let's think about your "psyche bank."
Now this is your mental health bank, your mindset and your overall fulfillment.
Are you careless with how you spend the money in your "psyche bank?"
Are you spending it on useless things that aren't actually bringing anything back into your account?
Are you giving it away to others but not receiving any from those you invest that time and energy into?
Are you pouring out loads of your psyche into areas that do not bring YOU any value?
Are you holding onto everything in your psyche bank, refusing to "spend" any of it...scared of not getting a return on your investment?
Now let me say this again.
"If it costs you more energy than it is giving you, then it is time to walk away."
I also want to stress that this won't necessarily be an instant gratification transaction, but you need to make sure you are keeping inventory.
Make sure you value your energy, protect your energy and use it wisely.
We are only given this one life and if you are ''psyche bank rich," it will be a way more enjoyable life. I promise!
Not only will this make for a more abundant life for you, but everyone you come into contact with as well.
So take some time to re-evaluate your relationships, your down time, your work and any other circumstance that kept coming to mind...because fun fact for you...
If there was a specific thing that kept popping up in your mind as you read this, that is a sign.
That tells me that you know deep down, that "thing" is something it is time to walk away from.
BUT-it may also mean that it is an area that you are scared you don't deserve or aren't actually investing the proper time and energy into.
No matter the case, remember to chew on it....
With Love and Energy,
***If this is something that really hit home for you, click the link below to schedule your complimentary 30-minute session to start gaining clarity on what your next steps should be!